It’s More Than $0.02, Less Than $0.20 (#1)

Am I late to this party or just in time? This is where I say, “Well here’s my two cents on the subject.” Well its more than two. Last night, while attempting to ignore my son while he chewed on his thumb and made annoying noises, and that man of mine that sticks to me like white on rice, I tried unsuccessfully to ignore a documentary/movie called, “Diary of a Tired Black Man.”

There were valid points such as:

    • Women make bad decisions when it comes to dating
    • They stay in non productive/abusive relationships too long
    • 90% of black women are raised by single women
    • Fathers are not in the home to represent what a good man is supposed to be like
    • Women pass up “the nice guy” for the thug
    • Women emulate what they see (mothers who are angry black women – ABS)
    • Single girlfriends who are bitter do not make good counselors to those in relationships

Okay. Now the female side of the argument is this:

    • The burden of parenting/discipline falls on their shoulders
    • You like who you like. If its only brotherly love that you feel, so be it.
    • Men emulate what they see (the player, pimp, or lazy guy)
    • ABS started when men stopped being productive members of the household
    • “Brothers” have no ambition and are too content to coast
    • When men don’t have a valid counterpoint, they often escalate to violence
    • Other than those women who wanted a child regardless, most women black or otherwise don’t choose to become single mothers

The points are valid on either side. In some aspects, regardless of color, the arguments apply to all ethinicitys. No one group is excluded although statistics may be higher in one race group. At multiple points during the movie I wanted to make counter points and open the dialogue. Lets see if we can do that here. What are your thoughts?

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5 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. The T
    Apr 21, 2011 @ 00:34:17

    you should know that some of your audience is white… (like me)…you could just be angry, not angry and black….wink..wink…



    • erinjamison
      Apr 21, 2011 @ 01:16:35

      Hi “The T”,

      Thanks for responding. I wanted to open the discussion up to anyone, all ethnicities. The movie specifically talked about women in the black community but some of the same points apply to other groups as well.


  2. Free Lee
    Apr 21, 2011 @ 09:43:00

    I agree that the arguments are valid on both sides. I think alot of it also has to do with settling & being selfish. For men sometimes its “I don’t want her, but I don’t really want anybody else to have her either”. Well if you don’t want me then clear the way for someone who might. For us women sometimes it just “OMG my palms are sweating, he’s leaving but I don’t want to be alone! There are such problems as bad arguments, acts of agression, staying out late, random phone calls in the middle of the night, and good sex. So we just hold on, no matter how disfunctional, and it becomes a cycle. Question is, how is it broken and who’s strong enough to break it?


    • erinjamison
      Apr 21, 2011 @ 10:07:58

      Though I will be making another post about this, the main thing that came from the movie was that black women are angry and that anger is a perpetual cycle. From what I understood, men interviewed in the piece think that it a cultural mindset that needs to be changed. The arguments you’ve presented seem to support the claims that women make bad decisions when it comes to relationships and are unable to recognize the sign of a “good man” because those father figures have been absent in the family structure.


  3. nasty bukkake
    May 01, 2011 @ 10:36:13

    We all want to fall in love. Why? Because that experience makes us feel completely alive. Where every sense is heightened, every emotion is magnified, our everyday reality is shattered and we are flying into the heavens.


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